Trust

Lately I have been learning a very difficult lesson...trusting God in the hard times. This is not one of those "trust fall moments," no this is much bigger. Where I find myself right now is a place I never thought I would be, a place with no answers, no security, no safety nets. I don't like this place.
Instead of being able to "manufacture" peace, I have been thwarted on all sides. It seems that my efforts seem to dry up. I am left to wonder if God is there at all. Does He hear me? Does He even care?
When I take a step back and try to gain perspective, I begin to blush. It seems that I am refusing to act on advice I freely give to others.
God is in control. I still believe that (even though sometimes my actions deny it). In times like these I have the wonderful/awful chance to put my faith into full view of others. What will they do when they see a man and his family keep believing in spite of the circumstances? I hope it strengthens people's faith, and possibly introduces some to experience what real faith is all about.
At any rate, God has my attention. It hurts honestly. I have cried. I have felt abandoned. I have felt hopeless.
God is beginning to end the silence, His whispering voice is still there. I know He loves me, and He will provide. I simply must begin to trust Him anew. He is the Good Shepherd after all, I have nothing to fear. He brings me comfort (something that is in short supply in this world).
If you find yourself in a place like I do, I want you to know that I do not pity you. In fact, it might prove to be the best place...a place of desperation. In that place God can show Himself strong. Let Him.